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LETTER TO
MY SON
My dearest beloved Chike;
 Was
that your shadow in the hallway today? Was that your face in
the distant crowd? Did I hear you laugh out loud? I saw a
rainbow in the sky today - tell me beloved son, did you send
it my way with love? I see your likeness at every turn,
you're with me still son, in oh so many ways - through every
minute, every hour of everyday .
All I ever wanted was to give you strong wings, to be there
when you tested them against the windy places and newfound
spaces.
All I ever hoped for was to be there if you needed a cushion
if you fell. Now it must suffice that you are soaring in
places, new spaces I cannot see; that someone new watches
over you, helping you watch over your family, till we
re-unite in our heavenly celestial home.
While you were still a young boy, your grandfather named you
'Ozuomba'; how prophetic, because in your short life span,
you connected empathized and positively impacted everyone,
from every walk of life you came in contact with. Witness my
son the outpouring of love your memory evokes. Your friends
from Kings Canterbury Secondary School in England will be in
our midst for a last cheerio; I know you'll be over the moon
as you watch in dignified silence.
After law school you were adamant you wanted to relocate
from England to Nigeria to try your hand in the oil
business, you said it would provide you the foundation you
needed to make the difference in your country you dreamed
about. I thought then son, it was a marvelous idea, now, I
know for sure God sent you home to bond for a prolonged
sweet goodbye. And what a goodbye it was! Your boundless
youthful optimism brought me untold joy at a time I needed
it most in my life. You opened my heart to untold untapped
emotions.
Memories come flooding in of our times together these past
couple of years. Thank you son, I will forever cherish them.
Our vacation in Dubai was a blast and I chuckle now at that
promise you made when we saw that beautiful diamond in the
store window, I thought it was too expensive but you thought
it would not compare to the one you were going to buy me
someday! I'll always remember son, you said I was worth it
and more! Sunsets in Mauritius and Johannesburg will never
be the same. You had lofty dreams and were positive Nigeria
would be at par with all the exotic sites you saw, after
your generation was done transforming it! While some were
cynical about your dear country, you called it the land of
milk and honey!
Your steely determination never ceased to amaze me. I can
still hear the tenacity in your voice those days things did
not go quite the way you planned them. You always assured me
you were young and not afraid of failure. You were always
going to dust yourself off and keep trying 'till you met
with success. I will miss our evening sessions reviewing
your day's activities. You were so quick to grasp how
business worked in Nigeria; you were poised to beat your
mother at her own game on her own turf! I gave you shoulders
to stand on and you saw farther than I ever could have
imagined! These memories are forever seared in my heart and
I thank god for having given me YOU.
I am tempted to say goodbye Chike, but beloved son death is
nothing at all. Yes, you have turned the bend and slipped
into eternal life, but I am I and you are still you, what we
were to one another, we still are! I'll still be listening
for your calm soothing voice when things get tough. Though
you are now out of sight, you will never be out of mind.
There will be unbroken continuity.
"A light from the family is gone
A voice we loved is stilled
A place is vacant in the home
Which never can be filled
We have to mourn the loss of one
We would've love to keep
But God surely loved him best,
Has finally made him sleep."
Saying a permanent bye would have been the hardest to do
but what hurts the most is not having the chance to say it
to you. "If tears could build a stairway and memories a
lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you back again",
but my grief can never be such that I would challenge the
Master's plan. Your departing left me with precious memories
that I will fill the void with remembered joys. I will
always see your face in the morning sunlight and your
reflection in the stars and moon at night.
Eternal Love,
Mom
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